Wednesday, February 4, 2015

Gastric Sleeve Surgery: A Wife's Perspective - Part 1 - Deciding to do this and attending a seminar

Every Wednesday, I am going to write about the process of Eric going through weight loss surgery to record my feelings and perspective as the wife on the sidelines.  As this is an extremely personal decision on Eric's part to change his life, I am trying my best to stay true to my feelings, while at the same time accurately recording the events.

To date, Eric has been through an informational seminar, a physical, a nutrition class, completed the swallow test, and had an endoscopy completed.  All that is left is a psych evaluation and the actual surgery.

The two of us on our wedding day April 26, 2003.  We had been on Weight Watchers together prior to the wedding and both had success, but neither of us were at goal weight.  We have also both gone up and down in weight loss efforts during our marriage.

During Christmas vacation this past year, Eric mentioned to me that he was seriously considering gastric bypass surgery to lose weight.  It felt like it was coming out of left field, but it wasn't.  Apparently, we had this conversation about two years ago in which I was firmly opposed to the idea.  I don't remember the conversation, but it doesn't surprise me that I would have said no.

It scared me.

I guess I put it out of my mind.  But Eric didn't.  He has been researching the process and carefully considering whether or not this would be something he wanted to do.

When he brought it up again a few weeks ago, I was ready to talk about it and learn more about the procedure.  So was Eric because he signed us up the next day for a seminar at the Fresno Heart Hospital!

One day we were "talking" about it, and the next day we were driving across town to learn about all the different types of surgery, complications, benefits, and insurance details.

I enjoyed listening to the doctor.  He was a confident man.  I felt better about Eric's desire to do this after hearing him speak.

There have been several periods of time where Eric was very active, but it didn't automatically equal a great deal of weight loss.  He has a desire to be more active, but at the moment, his weight is making that difficult.

I have a friend that I used to work with that had this surgery last year and has lost a significant amount of weight.  I think knowing others who have done the surgery, and knowing it is not a "new" procedure anymore makes it easier for me to accept.

We left the seminar that day with Eric picking up an informational packet and calling for an appointment with the doctors to determine if he is indeed a candidate.

After leaving the seminar, we went to eat at Mimi's and talk about the drastic changes that we were about to embark upon.

It took some time for me to come around to accepting that this is really going to happen.  I have told Eric that as his wife and as a family we will do anything and everything to support him, including changing many of our eating and sedentary habits as well.  This is going to be a permanent lifestyle change for him, but I intend for it to be a positive change for me as well.

I am scared of him undergoing surgery.  I'm nervous about him adapting to this new level of decreased food.  I'm worried that he'll regret the decision and not be able to do anything about it.  I'm worried about how I'll need to help the whole family make changes.  However, any time I bring up my fears to Eric, he answers the questions with confidence.  He is not afraid of any portion of this.  He is just looking forward to a new life.

Next up: the doctor appointment to determine whether or not Eric is a candidate for the surgery.


  1. Thanks for sharing your family's story. I'm coming your way via Tuesday Talk and am inspired by the choices you and your husband made!

  2. I've consisered the surgery too and will appreciate your posts. Best wishes!